PART 48

Can you ever really trust your own mind? With the definition of reality being “the state OR QUALITY of being real”… can you fully believe in the concreteness and actuality of anything?  I think there are two ways of going about your life with that question in mind.

1.

Make a little time for yourself. Take a walk in a cavern. Lay in a field of rosemary. Drink from the bluest ocean. And make a definitive decision on what you are going to base your entire existence around. Once that decision is made… DO NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO REMOTELY CHANGE YOUR MIND OTHERWISE. You can get into titilating debates where, in the end, both parties involved walk away feeling like they both got their points across.  But in the core of yourself… do not change. Make your choice and believe it… believe it… believe it. Don’t question the path you created. Simply believe that the Earth is round and the sun provides heat and that gravity is a comforting presence. Believe that God turned into a man and heaven is real and hell is waiting and doves and rivers of blood are not symbolism in mythology but created by a creator to effect the created. And believe that it won’t kill you if you eat grapes and drink coffee in the morning and that jogging increases muscle mass and that America is superior to all and should have a hand in all governments AND personal lives of everyone everywhere. And believe that you are right and that EVERYONE ELSE WHO DOESN’T BELIEVE WHAT YOU BELIEVE IS WRONGE  AND THEY JUST HAVE SHIT LUCK TO NOT BE YOU.

2.

Or you can live in a great terror. A man hanging in the vast and horrible winds of doubting everything. Because if reality is simply based on “a quality” then everything in your reach is up for debate and scrutiny and dissection. You’ll feel free within this mindset and nothing will suppress you or control your thoughts and actions and feelings. And you won’t live with the guilt of knowing you’ve chosen a path for your own comfort that isn’t based on anything but yourself. And those kinds of perks can get you through your time here in this world. But there will be moments when you will lay in that same field of rosemary, and walk through that same cavern, and drink from that same blue ocean. And you will feel alone and unprotected from the immense unknowns of everything. Once faith and science and love and math kneel to the great god of your own suspecting mind; nothing will be left to comfort you but you. And you will stare at the universe and pretend to create a path of belief for yourself… just to see what it feels like. And those that actually believe will communally stare back at your from their side of the galaxy. And they will scream to you,  “WHY ARE YOU CHOOSING TO GO IT ALONE!?“ And you will scoff and smirk in their direction… but you will not be able to answer them. And that’s ok.